Tomorrow’s Gonna be Yesterday in a Couple of Days

I managed to write one whole post in February. Impressive, I know... There is actually a reason I haven’t written much lately, and that’s what this post is about. When I write, I express what I see and feel throughout the day, something that has been on my mind, or relate something that has happened. Writer’s block sets in when I can’t seem to fit those into appropriate words.

A little over a week ago my mother passed away after battling with cancer for about 9 months. My first reaction was echoed by a button worn by a lady who works in the chemo therapy where she had been receiving treatment: cancer sucks.

There were many great aspects to her character, which make her absence all the more evident. She was kind, generous, vibrant, unafraid to speak her mind yet always willing to listen and provide advice full of practicality. She was a mother to all who needed one, as many of my friends can attest. She is the person who everyone missing her right now wants to talk to because she would listen and help provide perspective to get through today.

My family is pretty great, especially when you consider the fact it is a “blended” family. See, Linda was my “step”-mom, but the way she treated my sister and I, and the way our dad treats our “step”-sisters made that prefix of no use in our family. Essentially, “the parents” had four kids. Simple as that.

She made my dad happy. Don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t some sad, miserable sap, but he wasn’t happy. When they got married, I saw her slowly help him unload so much baggage that hampered his potential. Together, they were so generous, and it never seemed like it was hard, I think because they gave so much to each other. In spending time with my dad and sisters this past week I saw one of the lasting gifts she gave us, the strength to know how to make it to tomorrow. My dad knows he can make good decisions and keep going, and that was a strength and confidence I didn’t really see in him before he knew Linda.

As far as us siblings are concerned I noticed a sentiment, unspoken yet I believe we all share. Me, I think about how when I get married, my wife will never know my mother. My sisters won’t get to have mom there for the birth of a first child, or my nephews’ graduations, or (fill-in-the-blank). We want her there is because she was so awesome at all of the previous events (big or small) in our lives. Even though she won’t be there we can be thankful for all the cherished memories we’ve gotten to collect with her in them.

And she could cook. Or more accurately: she made edible magnificence.